What do You Want?

(listening to "Bitches Brew" by Miles Davis)
I love owning a home. It's 8 a.m., and I have the music turned up quite loud.

Thinking of stuff that you want can be fun mental masturbation. It can also be frustrating, of course. The thought occurred to me that some of my material desires have changed over the years, and some have not. One can make some inferences about a person's personality and character by looking at what makes them salivate.

I will turn 32 in less than a month. Here is a fictional, "if I had a magic wand" birthday list.

A computer chip, implanted in my brain, which contains all the knowledge of a plumber, an electrician, a carpenter, a roofer and a landscaper

Some sort of Harry Potter type magic that allows my kitchen to be thrice its present size without altering the floor plan of the house

George W. Bush, wearing my Starbucks apron, selling coffee FOREVER

The ability to sing

Beer taps (Guinness Stout, Bell's Pale Ale and Pilsner Urquell) in every room of the house

13 aquariums full of guacamole

An island in the South Pacific, which I would name "Orange-o-nesia"

Here's a slightly less ridiculous list:
A new deck (made out of composite, and in a cool color)

A Viking gas cooktop

Skylights here and there in the house

A trip to the UK

A trip to Napa Valley

A pair of Vandersteen Audio model 2's or Definitive Technology BP7002's

A Parasound Halo A21 power amplifier and P3 preamplifier

A new laptop, a GPS unit, a good digital camera, and several months to drive around the country (writing, taking pictures, eating, drinking, and sharing it with y'all)

A little closer to reality:

A good bottle of Scotch (I think I have my heart set on Lagavulin, but some Glenfarclas or Bruichladdich would be lovely also)

Dinner at Ruth's Chris

A Craftsman socket set

Some Woody Allen movies on DVD, particularly Manhattan

A red Kitchenaid food processor

A 10-inch Shun chef's knife ("oh, yeah, baby," as that oaf Emeril would say)

Something orange - a set of coasters, a polo shirt, a monogrammed bathrobe, etc.


As you can see, the banality of my desires increases in direct proportion to the likelihood of my receiving them.

What sort of picture of me does this paint? I don't know. It's just a bunch of nonsense I typed while drinking coffee and listening to Miles Davis. I like toys and good things to eat and drink. I enjoy life.

Hell, I don't need anything. It's been a great year, and the only taint on its glory was my unhappy job situation. I married a ludicrously good woman, got a house and got a job. I've got everything a sane man could want. My sanity is not entirely squared away, though.